Cheap Cheese

25 has been a pretty good age for me. I can't complain. Well, that's not true because I often do. It's scary and exciting and tumultuous, but it feels like we're starting to lay down some sort of foundations for these lives we're building.

It's a Thursday night and we have company coming. Our go-to dinner is Fondue - - Always a crowd-pleaser. Our very own fondue pot, fully accessorized with color-coded spears?? (wait a second, what the heck do we call the spear/dipping things?!?) and hot pink place-mats conjures up memories of the Candy Land board game.
It looks sooo decadent and fills the quaint basement apartment with the aroma of melted cheese. My favorite food group.

But, the best part about fondue night is that it's dirt cheap. We can feed a group of us with some sourdough bread, vegetables, a beer, and a package of shredded cheese (preferably on sale). Then we sit around the melted dish for a long evening of cherished conversation.

And I am completely content.

We are literally living from paycheck to paycheck with fairly recently acquired bills and graduate school loans causing us to second guess our unquenchable drive for higher education. 75% of our lives were spent in the safety net of "home" and here we are now pretending we know how to build our own.

The glimmer of a flawless diamond in a friend's engagement ring reminds me of the reality that our lives can completely change course in an instant. But for this one evening, we're all right here. And that's something wonderful.
We giggle, we pretend we have it all figured out, and we learn lessons the hard way.

Dinner? Success.



At 25, here's what I do know:
I'm a work in progress
My life is far from glamorous
Nothing will ever take the place of nights filled with cheap cheese & rich conversation


Song of the Day: Nothing Better by The Postal Service

At Least Saturn is Still a Planet

5:55am
I'm on a treadmill - running my heart out but not going anywhere - because the ice outside gives no friction.

Treadmills can make you crazy. So much movement, so much being still breeds a compulsive type of thinking. But today, I am victim to someone watching the Discovery Channel on the gym TV. Topic of the morning: Saturn.

At the age of 7, I decided to read everything I could find on the solar system. My favorite planet was Saturn (yes, it may have extremely nerdy to like planets but I was still a girl...Saturn had pretty rings). We lived in Kentucky, there wasn't a whole lot to do but read.

According to the Discovery Channel, which would obviously never lie to a viewer, one theory is that the rings were formed by a destroyed smaller planet or moon of Saturn. This moon, perhaps a little risky, ventured too close to Saturn and was pulled in so violently by her strong gravitational forces, the purest form of attraction...that it was destroyed.
Blown into tiny bits and left to circle the planet forever in the form of beautiful rings.

I almost tripped on the treadmill as it occurred to me:

Some days you're Saturn

some days you're its moon.



Song of the Day: Cosmic Love by Florence + the Machine

New Year's Revolutions

"So, did you make a new year's resolution this year?"
"No, I think they're ridiculous because no one ever keeps them."

If the above exchange has happened to you, you've been the victim of New Year's disillusionment.

I've talked to so many people this year who feel this way, who don't see the point to making a resolution because it will be broken. Bout, resolutions aren't wishes that you make on stars ord whil e wearing bihrthday party thats. It's simple goal-seitting - you either fight or you give in. Don't doom yourself with doubt.

This year, instead of a resolution, I decided to have a new year's REVOLUTION. There's tons of little habits I have which I wish I didn't for example: hitting the snooze button, drinking diet soda, not standing up straight - - aspects that I am not proud of. Ergo, 2011 is the year of being the version of me of whom I would be proud. My personal revolution. If not now, then when??

Now, this hasn't been easy. A Revolution is a long road. In fact I had a diet coke today...I hate the fact that I have a weakness for diet sodas, I mean seriously, they don't even taste good. But, the revolution has made me more aware of myself. Several times throughout the day I stop and ask myself something cheesy like "are you being the person you wish you were?" And if I take enough time to answer "no", those are the days when I don't grab the coke.
Even though I'm not 100% different, it's still an improvement from not trying. It's a few steps closer to the ideal Robyn.

Be brave, Revolt!


Reasons why 2011 is going to be a-MAZ-ing:

11 is a prime number
Each year we're learning from our mistakes (hopefully)
Eleven is fun to say
my iTunes collection has improved since last year
20-elevensies is going to catch on, I can feel it
Do you have any others?


Song of the Day: Cigarettes by The Wreckers

Any Other Name Would Smell Just As Sweet

In my opinion the art of choosing a blog name lies in finding one that makes sense, can some how apply to you (that's you, not me), and of course references something greater.



Worry is a theme in my daily life. If any given time you asked me what I was worried about, I would have an answer. This summer on my way to a new job I was so worried and scared that I made myself sick. Yet, it's common for me - before exams, first impressions, public speaking - I waste minutes of life in futile fear.

But, this commute was different. I realized I had wasted the entire morning not listening to the amazing playlist I had made, but instead freaking out over worst case scenarios and I didn't even know what was causing the fear. It was an inefficient way to spend the present, these moments that none of us will get back.

And then I remembered that Bible verse we always hear at June weddings:

"There is no fear in love, but perfect love drives out fear" 1 Jn 4:18

The fear is there because I let it in.
I allow this silly fear/worry/anxiety to play a theme

But, what if every time we felt the needless anxiety creep in, in the form of knots in our shoulders, we just focused on how to love better?

I think that a lot of our choices fall somewhere on a spectrum anchored by Love at one end and Fear at the other. I'm a pendulum that swings back and forth between the two.

Although striving for love, I usually fall somewhere...in between.



Song for the day: If It Kills Me by Jason Mraz